"Mim, seriously, calm down and stop reading into everything I say," He didn't even need to shoot her more than a glance to know she had one of those looks, the sort of looks females everywhere seemed to have perfected from the age of about four (after all, even his little sister could do it) where every sentence really meant something completely different in their mind from what was actually said. As far as Noah was concerned it was infuriating and pretty high up the list of reasons why he was eternally glad he was not going to be stuck with a female until death did they part. Not that he had anything against girls, some of his closest friends were, but he could escape them when they started pulling weird shit as they seemed biologically programmed to do with serious aptitude. "I have no idea if he ever wanted Gail, she was just an example, I could have said Lodge or Willoughby or even McArthur. Point is, you need to keep him interested in you so that he doesn't even remember those girls names."

Apparently however the reading into things was not about to end any time soon, and the affronted look upon her face as Noah handed her another sheet of scribbled on parchment at his comment about McKinney being glad to be getting any action at all was nearly enough to set him off snickering again, or at least it would have been if he hadn't reckoned she would pour his ink all over him in retaliation. Rolling his eyes he contemplated soothing her ego but reckoned instead that he would simply dig himself a deeper hole. In any case the fact that Mim had apparently blundered into the big bad world of sex headfirst with no map to guide her was most definitely a bigger issue in the long run than her tetchiness and easily poked at self-esteem.

"Now that is a long list," Not that Noah reckoned he could actually reel off a long list, his knowledge was not that vast considering he could count on just over one hand the number of people he had kissed and on one finger along the number of people he had had actual sex with. And that really didn't count; anything that disastrous deserved to be struck from the records after all. Pausing for a moment in his search through the notes Noah contemplated how to elaborate. It was all very well saying she could do this or get Grant to do that, however ultimately he was not a girl and had no idea how they worked having never felt overly required to learn the ins and outs of turning them on, and well, as far as his sister was concerned knowing that such a thing as a clitoris existed put him ahead of entirely too many straight guys in that department anyway. Which really didn't bode well for teenage girls everywhere at all, Mim included.

Still, clearly he needed to advise her on things he did actually know his arse from his elbow about, and seeing as he doubted learning how to jack Grant off in the five minutes between classes was high on Mim's list of things to do before summer, his options were somewhat limited.

"Well, you could always give him head," He paused, realizing that he should probably mention the other side of the coin, "Or he could go down on you, but please for the love of Merlin's baggy y-fronts don't even make me go into that one."

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Noah 'Waygay' van Hagens